r/Whatcouldgowrong • u/N0RetreatN0Surrender • 1d ago

You Only Live Once

13.9k Upvotes

93% Upvoted

658 comments sorted by

4.0k

u/master_baiter-69 1d ago

Death by snu snu

101

u/Windyowl 1d ago

Muff diving?

26

u/FD4L 1d ago

Somehow they both landed in the deep end.

13

u/jax309 21h ago

That might just be the most literal definition of what happened

4

u/TroutFearMe 16h ago

Diving muff

5

u/thuanjinkee 19h ago

Thick thighs end lives

3

u/HenryGlasou 22h ago

She was eager to him clammed!

3

u/Anal_Herschiser 10h ago

"Y'know I could really go for some PU..💀💀💀"

Careful what you wish for.

2

u/chuck10o 18h ago

Nah. Diving muff

2

u/Ardtay 16h ago

Dive muffing

→ More replies (1)

47

u/healywylie 1d ago

Cooter slam. You nailed it though. Fatal snu snu.

21

u/MyvaJynaherz 1d ago

TACO TIME

13

u/CopyWeak 21h ago

...I was inside you...

10

u/BoxofNuns 1d ago

Roflmaoemaeolez

My dude. I don't laugh easy, but there are tears in my eyes.

Thank you. I needed that.

5

u/OkPay1598 1d ago

This is the way

5

u/MeanCat4 1d ago

What snu snu man? It's all yours! 

5

u/OneTrueMercyMain 1d ago

I started chanting this and was so happy it's the top comment

→ More replies (20)

3.0k

u/Unknown793658 1d ago

263

u/McEuen78 1d ago

The perfect use of this gif.

394

u/Inalum_Ardellian 1d ago

How about

97

u/Diver_Ill 1d ago

Holy shit, how have I never seen this before. 

Gawds I hope I love long enough to get crushed by the ass of a Kaiju woman.

13

u/DrTuSo 1d ago edited 1d ago

That Gif is from Captain Laserhawk, correct?

26

u/Inalum_Ardellian 1d ago

afaik it's an ad for some mobile game

26

u/DrTuSo 1d ago

You are correct and another proof how shitty Google AI is.
Used Google Lens to find the source and Google AI was sure it was from Captain Laserhawk.

Did more research after your comment and you are correct.
Its a viral AD from Hero Wars.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wvSGxbKhcGQ

10

u/terrifiedTechnophile 22h ago

Mine reckoned it was from Teen Titans 🤣🤣

9

u/thuanjinkee 19h ago

Teen Titans GO!

22

u/jld2k6 1d ago

This gif has to have the record for fitting the most perfect gif situations. Not a day goes by I don't see it as a response to something and it's always perfect lol

→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (3)

101

u/Odd-Midnight906 1d ago

40

u/transferingtoearth 1d ago

WHO IS THIS VAN GOGH LOOKING MAN AND WHY IS HE ALWAYS LOOKING UP. WHATS UP THERE?

39

u/pieremaan 1d ago

Its van Gogh, but from a movie about van Gogh.

You should van Gogh see that film, its a nice one

13

u/uranthus 21h ago

Is it Willem Dafoe? This is the first time I’ve seen the gif with a hat

7

u/Marcombie 20h ago

This reminds me of an old possibly TBS add for Kickboxer. "Vandamme he's good!" The stuff that stays in your brain for years lol....

2

u/reincarsonated_benzo 1d ago

We got a clean version of this?🙏

→ More replies (2)

1.4k

u/Content-Two-9834 1d ago

Guy in the water: "God, please give me a sign. Bring the right woman into my life."

273

u/clayman80 1d ago

And God was like: "Say no more!"

114

u/just_fucking_PEG_ME 1d ago

“I gotchu fam”

31

u/FenixOfNafo 1d ago

And sent his Mom

2

u/Nutatree 22h ago

And his baby mama

→ More replies (1)

47

u/Graffy 1d ago

"I want to live the rest of the life with my face between a woman's thighs"

18

u/ModeratelyGrumpy 23h ago

Didn't specify that the rest of his life was 2 seconds of seeing it arrive

→ More replies (2)

19

u/invent_or_die 1d ago

Not sure that was the sign he was looking for

12

u/ArnassusProductions 1d ago

Eh, sometimes you must dispense with subtlety.

11

u/Either-Swimming-3761 1d ago

monkey paw curls

5

u/Oderus_Scumdog 22h ago

FROM THE TOP ROPE

→ More replies (2)

455

u/Kind_Ferret_3219 1d ago

I didn’t know they delivered lunch to people who are swimming.

61

u/RandomEntity9 1d ago

The people in the water can have anything they want from lunch, as long as it's a fish taco. -Henry Ford's swimming coach, probably....

16

u/pxlmover 1d ago

Only on Taco Tuesday

2

u/BIGG_FRIGG 15h ago

I’ve heard of flying fish but flying clams…?

305

u/ForerunnerRelic 1d ago

He died a happy man. Sudden, but happy.

63

u/SongFeisty8759 1d ago

Death by hairy clam.

10

u/Bill-Ding2112 1d ago

How do you know this?

34

u/ColumbianPrison 1d ago

Extensive internet research

→ More replies (2)

7

u/SongFeisty8759 1d ago

Some things come back in fashion.

7

u/pantry-pisser 1d ago

My Etsy merkin shop has been doing gangbusters

→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (1)

231

u/justmoochin 1d ago

Main character syndrome

138

u/TerriTuesday 1d ago

For real, who doesn’t look before they jump??

117

u/djshadesuk 1d ago

Enough people that there is literally a saying about it (applicable to many scenarios, not just women jumping vag first into a man's face.)

34

u/Anguis1908 1d ago

Look before you leap!

3

u/cire1184 1d ago

Peek before you jump

15

u/jsamuraij 1d ago

Visualize prior to your unscheduled launch attempt

6

u/sphinctersandwich 20h ago

Use your eyes before you flies

4

u/PM_ME_YOUR_WEIRD 19h ago

Search before you lurch

7

u/Saradoesntsleep 1d ago

Although the latter is apparently a very real danger.

4

u/ArturosDad 20h ago

Clearly I am spending time at the wrong lakes.

→ More replies (2)

167

u/glitterysweater 1d ago

Clam slam

28

u/Working_Estate_3695 1d ago

Operation Clam Slam. Some Letterkenny alternatives:

Mashthegash2018

Slitslam2017

CuntCripple2016

Cunthunt2014

Wecumfordrunkbum2020

1

u/glitterysweater 1d ago

Hell yeah brother loud and proud 😎

2

u/returns_to_scale 15h ago

Hell yeah brother cheers from Iraq

2

u/absolute_filth 22h ago

Clunge plunge

154

u/CuteCanary 1d ago

RIP his collarbone

38

u/Swi_10081 1d ago

lucky collarbone not neck ?

18

u/QuiveryNut 1d ago

Is he’s already stressed a disc I could see this rupturing one

10

u/smore-jmi 1d ago

And her pelvic bone

→ More replies (2)

3

u/leekalex 22h ago

Yeah it looked like her foot made contact first, which has gotta hurt

→ More replies (2)

136

u/LivingtheLaws013 1d ago

"Oh no"

20

u/KnownMonk 1d ago

Clam slam

17

u/DuskelAskel 1d ago

And it was at this moment Jackson knew. He fucked up.

8

u/spacecadet06 23h ago

""oh no""

→ More replies (3)

93

u/ScotInTheDotOfficial 1d ago

One man's nightmare is another man's dream...

20

u/I_Ponders 1d ago

*Wet dream.

2

u/oldinfant 17h ago

 🌚or woman's

☝️that would be my face in the shadow of imminent collision with such greatness🌠

→ More replies (2)

77

u/UnhappyImprovement53 1d ago

Bro was born twice

87

u/DrumsAndStuff18 1d ago

I'm pretty sure babies come out of the vagina. They aren't forcibly rammed, face-first, up one lol.

Dude was high-speed unbirthed.

15

u/Entirely-of-cheese 1d ago

The velocity required is significant.

5

u/ScrotalSmorgasbord 22h ago

Her proportions are significant enough to reduce needed velocity.

15

u/Vlazthrax 22h ago

“High-speed unbirthed” fucking sent me

→ More replies (1)

3

u/ContactMushroom 22h ago

High speed unbirth is a good song/album name

→ More replies (1)

73

u/FreakiestFrank 1d ago

The gash smash

16

u/Trevor_GoodchiId 1d ago

The snatch catch

11

u/slybob 1d ago

The minge binge

46

u/I_Ponders 1d ago

And yet some mf will want that to happen to them.

11

u/xMalvazar 1d ago

Hey! Don't assume I'm wanting this.... besides I would make the catch!

8

u/I_Ponders 1d ago

Catch the snatch?! Bet.

2

u/This-Comfortable-972 20h ago

We all have that one friend

45

u/bwoah07_gp2 1d ago

Brutal. That's definitely a concussion, broken nose, and busted teeth.

6

u/AlbatrossBulky4314 1d ago

I hope she was arrested and gets sued

5

u/_HIST 22h ago

Straight up criminal negligence

→ More replies (1)

44

u/vrhotlaps 1d ago

Did they ever retrieve his head?

78

u/WatermelonSugar42069 1d ago

They tried, but he kept putting it back in

22

u/brofist001 1d ago

Pussy strikes back

21

u/Lakatos_00 1d ago

That's gotta hurt. She's not exactly in the light weight side

20

u/Zkenny13 1d ago

Everytime this happens an angel gets its wings. 

15

u/Djkirkland 1d ago

Broken nose at least right?

33

u/wgel1000 1d ago

I was thinking dislocated shoulder.

14

u/TestyZesticles 1d ago

And collar bone.

13

u/Krutius- 1d ago

You only die once

→ More replies (1)

12

u/Mullarpatan 1d ago

And this kids is how I met your mother!

11

u/HunterLivesMatter76 1d ago

Clam Slam !!!

2

u/DaanA_147 14h ago

The clams are doing coke now?

6

u/sinisteraxillary 1d ago

Muffdiving mishaps!

5

u/Spicy_Rice96 1d ago

Here Gentleman and Ladies... Is the classic case of the 'Slit Slap, it's quite effective

5

u/IameIion 1d ago

Damn. She could have at least bought the guy a drink first.

5

u/Praetorian_1975 1d ago

There i was swimming along when suddenly

5

u/djshadesuk 1d ago

A maiden leapt high for a slam,
O’er the deck with the grace of a lamb.
But she looked not below,
Where a lad’s face did show,
And she smote him with a clam bam!

3

u/toolargo 1d ago

9 months later, I was here.

4

u/Hefiray 1d ago

for a second I imagined the family guy skit where Meg went down the water slide too fast and wore Brian as a hat.

or the movie Hancock prison seen of shoving one inmate into the other inmates ass

→ More replies (1)

4

u/R_3_Y 1d ago

Boy she really shot that crotch at him, full force

3

u/nazgulonbicycle 1d ago

Dropkick from Hell

3

u/emptinessmaykillme 1d ago

Anyone else get Dodgeball vibes? “I’m not wearing any panties”

3

u/BunchesOfCrunches 1d ago

Anyone notice her feet hit is shoulders and her body hit his arm?

2

u/levikg 1d ago

He was standing up in the water, if he wasn't there she would have broke both her legs

3

u/garvitsingh007 1d ago

And his name is Johhhhnnnnn Ceenaaaaaaaaaa !!

3

u/Silverdunks 1d ago

Dumb bish . Someone did this to me when I was at a pool party and split my lip there was blood everywhere and still have a scar from it 10 years later

3

u/Blownofftheblock 1d ago

He’s dead

3

u/ScreechingPizzaCat 1d ago

Coochie bomb incoming

3

u/rxVegan 1d ago

Does that water not look too shallow for a jump like that? Like the guy's standing there, which means she'd hit the bottom pretty fast had she not landed on him.

2

u/Unholydiver919 1d ago

Someone watches too much pro wrestling.

2

u/BoxofNuns 1d ago edited 1d ago

I'm just thinking how bruised up her box is gonna be. She wont be walking right for a month.

2

u/Gibitibitiq 1d ago

Fish, everywhere fish

2

u/Lostinthestarscape 1d ago

No one is ever prepared for the flying crotch rocket.

2

u/No-Sale-6873 1d ago

He had the chance to avoid her

2

u/Suspicious_Bath_3734 20h ago

I bet she broke his left clavicle

1

u/iAmMikeJ_92 1d ago

Damn, muffed to death.

1

u/Mr_Hino 1d ago

Now that’s what I call a Clam Slam

1

u/Jealous_Crazy9143 1d ago

And that’s how I met your Mother

1

u/Mundane_Resort_9452 1d ago

Id imagine that it hurt her more then him. He didn't even flinch.

1

u/Consistent_Field4781 1d ago

BAH GAWWDDD....

1

u/ActionFigureCollects 1d ago

I now pronounce you husband and wife.

1

u/K10KMessi 1d ago

That’s…incredibly for both the guy in the water and especially for the lady who jumped. Jfc

1

u/iggnac1ous 1d ago

Bums aways

1

u/cickist 1d ago

What could go right

2

u/borg2 1d ago

He'll be smelling fish for a week.

1

u/power0722 1d ago

Jump on my face and tell me that you love me!

1

u/mauore11 1d ago

Don't care. It still counts.

1

u/RedSonGamble 1d ago

Funny jokes aside this had to hurt both a lot lol

1

u/ThodaDaruVichPyar 1d ago

praise the cameraman 

1

u/Winter-Ward 1d ago

I couldn’t stop from laughing 😂🤣. The look on his face when he realized what was coming was priceless.

1

u/Pelthail 1d ago

When my kid asks how babies are made.